Does It Really Start This Early?

So the other night as I was tucking Chloe into bed she said to me, "Mom, I've been thinkin'...."

I reply, "Oh yeah, What are you thinkin' about?"

Chloe says, "Well... (pause with hesitation), What is it gonna feel like when I have a boyfriend?"

Um.... are you kidding me? Are you freakin' kidding me? What is it gonna feel like? You are SIX! I don't need to worry about what it is going to feel like because I am sure I have mentioned before that you are not going to date until your 25 and you won't be married before your 30! So get those stinkin' butterflies out of your stomach and forget the feeling because you have a lot of growing up to do before you feel that way about anyone! Whoa.... Calm down... Breathe... In... Out...

I reply, "You know Chloe, it will be fun and exciting. You will have butterflies in your stomach every time you see him. You will be happy to see him. But, Chloe... the only boyfriend you will have for a very long time is your Dad. So let's just stick with that. How about it?"

Chloe: "Yeah Mom... I know... I was just thinkin'!"

I turned to leave her room and for the first time in a while I felt... scared, unprepared, and incapable. How do I raise this kid to avoid the mistakes I made... How do I prepare her to make 'good' choices... I am in way over my head.

Happy Halloween

Tooth fairy and Duck

Hay ride to the Pumpkin Patch

This one looks good!

Kate marks her by sitting on it!

Halloween has come and gone... We had a great time! Kate was a TROOPER! She followed Chloe everywhere she went! She filled up her little pumpkin to the top with candy! As we were trick or treating I tried to lighten Kate's load of candy by stuffing my pockets to make her pumpkin not so heavy... but she wouldn't have it! Oh no... She had a fit! "Mine Mom! Mine candy!" So I emptied my pockets back in her trick or treat bag and on she went... until about a block from the house. "Too heavy, Mom! Too heavy, Dad's turn." So she parked herself on Colin's shoulders and demanded that he continue to trick or treat with her on his shoulders. Silly Kate!

Chloe was the tooth fairy this year... and considering that there is no 'tooth fairy' costume to buy I had to get creative. We bought a regular fairy costume then cut out tooth shapes of felt and glued them on her costume and made her a tooth fairy wand. It was sufficient enough for her and off she went! She has been OBSESSED with the tooth fairy lately... since her teeth have started falling out. She has mentioned on many occasions that she wants to grow up to be the tooth fairy... How do I tell her that she will be one day, but that it comes without all the glam of wings, and pixie dust, and flying? Well... I guess one day she will figure it out all on her own.

Chloe did her round of trick or treating then she was ready to go home and hand out candy... to her that was just as fun as getting it! What can I say the tooth fairy is a giver... Right!?! We had a fun and safe Halloween!

It's No Daybreak... But I Guess It Will Do.

Guest Room/Sewing Room

Master Bedroom (unfinished)

Kate's Bedroom (partially finished)

Chloe's Room (Oh... the hours spent in here)

Kitchen with Eating Nook to the left.

Family Room

Front Room used to be a Formal Dining Room for previous owner.

Exterior including that sweet 'artificial' grass... No maintenance! Whoot! Whoot!

So we have been here for just over a month and it is beginning to feel a little more like home. I have been busy unpacking, organizing, painting, and discovering my OCD tendencies. I have had many moments of working on house projects, like painting my kids room, and wondering to myself... Hmmm... why is this so important to me? Why do I want things to be just right? Do I have a problem? (other than my addiction to Diet Coke... which is no secret.) Am I sacrificing something else in spending my time this way? When will I be "finished"? I have no answers to the above questions but I guess that awareness is the first step... Right?

Other than me staying busy with project after project... Colin has really enjoyed only being a few miles away from work. He is getting a little busier now the weather is starting to turn. Demo season is upon us and that means it is time for him to hit the road, but so far his travel schedule has been minimal in comparison to previous seasons. The shop set up is winding down and now it is time for the real business to begin. He enjoys running the show, and I'm happy he loves his job.

Chloe is getting settled at her new elementary and enjoys her teacher. Apparently, when your child goes to first grade you become one of the lesser important people in their lives because TEACHER knows it ALL. I was hoping that the age that my children stop idolizing me would at least be closer to... say... 15! Oh, Chloe... I love ya anyway.

Kate is a riot! She is persistent, stubborn and undeterred... she knows what she want and she will get it at all costs. I just hope that her persistence follows her through life and serves her well other than just getting fruit snacks out of mom before lunch... and dinner. Her vocabulary is blossoming daily and she is our little family parrot and will... repeat... anything... that is said. The other day out of the blue she told me to 'Shut up! Mom!' After I picked my jaw up off the floor and pulled myself together and promptly put her in time out, she quickly learned it is NOT okay to tell your mother to Shut Up!

So all in all we are doing well. I miss our friends and family in Utah more than words can express. I am still looking for the "reason" we were meant to be here, but for now we are here and doing what we can to make the best of it.

We are up and ready for visitors anytime! I promise to show you a good time and how could anyone pass up a FREE place to stay!

My Chloe is Growing Up!

Chloe has been looking forward to have a tooth fall out for YEARS! She had a little friend that lost a tooth a few years ago and ever since she has been sporadically running to me at full speed to tell me that her tooth IS loose, which unfortunately it wasn't. So as time passed her tooth finally decided it was time to wiggle... a little.

Then we started counting the 'sleeps' until her tooth would finally come out... I guessed 7 sleeps but how am I supposed to know? It was longer than 7 sleeps... I lost count. But after many days of wiggling and ultimately allowing her dad to clean pliers... that's right I said PLIERS... and try with them... which was barbaric and unsuccessful. Colin used floss and tied his triple whammy knot around her tooth and during an interrogation about her upcoming first day at school... He yanked and to her surprise... she finally lost her first tooth.

Now the chain reaction has started and the tooth fairy is eventually going to be broke. This tooth fairy isn't paying Jacksons 'round here! (I had a friend pay her son a $20 because that's all the ATM gave out! Um... note to self, go to ATM get cash then buy a diet coke or pack of gum! Then give the kid a buck or two...or 3!) So our tooth fairy dishes out 3 Washingtons but I thought that was pretty good considering I got maybe .25 cents. Inflation is a bee-otch!

So... Chloe was thrilled when her second tooth was getting looser and looser, but not to my surprise she wouldn't allow me or Colin to come within inches of her mouth to wiggle it or anything! Um... can we say traumatized from the first go 'round? So it wiggled and wiggled and got to the point that it was sooooo loose it was hanging on by a thread and would flap in a light breeze. So we convinced Chloe to give it a shot on her own. Here are the results! What a riot!

Chloe is in the First Grade

Chloe and her first grade teacher Mrs. Ayers

Chloe,

Today is a big day for you and as your mom I can't tell you how happy we are for you to start on this new adventure. You have grown up so quickly and I can't believe that from this day forward you will spend more time being educated by others than by me. I love you Chloe and am so proud of you.

Having said that... Chloe has done well with all the transition lately. We have moved into our new home here in Sherwood Oregon and are discovering the new neighborhood. My girls have been so resilient to all of the changes in the last year and I couldn't have made it through all this without them. Chloe has set a stellar example of how to go out an put yourself out there to make new friends and for that I appreciate her, because without her pulling me out to meet her new friends it would be so easy to stay to myself.

Baby Kate is hanging in there and now that Chloe is at school most of the day, Kate is continually asking me, "Mama, where is di-der (sister)?" I don't know how many different ways I can tell her that sister is at school and she is coming home soon. It has been nice to have some one on one time with Kate but I am pretty sure that we both miss Chloe while she is at school.

For now I am staying busy with unpacking and organizing the house. I am enjoying having a blank canvas to work with. So far I have painted one accent wall in my front room and I have painted Kate's room. I am working on Chloe's room now and can't wait until it is all put together. Pictures to come later... But for now I have to head to the bus stop to pick up Chloe from school!

What's Better Than Two Little Girls and a Tea Party?

So for Father's Day us girls decided to give Colin a digital photo frame with some new pictures to view.  So with the help of Seth's fiancee and some pearl jewelry and a tea set this is what we ended up with!  It was so fun to watch the girls play... the pictures turned out really well!  Thanks Bea!  

Freakin' Weekend Jammin' Project!

We started with a quick trip to the local berry farm and planned to pick as much as we could handle.... we maxed out at 103 lbs of Hood Strawberries!  

Then it was on once we got home to get the berries cleaned and ready for jam, needless to say... many hours upon hours later and down at least 25 lbs of sugar and other pectin mix... we were the ultimate Jaminators and polished off our Saturday to do list with 100 pints of Strawberry freezer jam that will last us all next YEAR!  This is just on of the benefits living with your mom... she teaches you ol' school and believes in slave labor!  What a kickback to when I was young!  Exhaustion has sent in now!  I will have some seriously sweet dreams though!  

Chloe's New Friend

This is Chloe's new friend from school. Her name is Harumi and she is
Japanese! Chloe has so much fun having playdates with her!

My Baby Kate... Is No Longer a Baby!

So I don't know how many mother's experience this but it has been quite the phenomenon with both my girls.  One day this precious little girl is your baby and the next day you wake up and it seems she has grown years overnight!  I don't know if it was her most recent haircut (I know she looks like a rag-a-muffin in this picture) or what but she is a little girl now... So what do I call her? Baby Kate just had a ring to it but it doesn't work so much now.... Hmmm, she will always be my Baby Kate!

So Long... and Overdue!

So there have been plenty of times that I should have opened my computer to share my thoughts, complaints, successes, setbacks, emotional meltdowns and better days, but for whatever reason I have avoided blogging. I will try to get back on the bandwagon but for now here is the update since the last post.

We have been in Portland for coming on 5 months now and I personally am getting slightly more comfortable with the move or maybe just coming to accept the fact that no matter how much I wish I were back in Utah- that won't change for now. It has been quite the interesting experience, to say the least, living with my family. I am so grateful to them for making room for us while we make this transition. We are fortunate to be able to stay with them while we search for the right place for our family to be.

It is official though, after only 4 months on the market (and considering the current state of the economy) we sold our home in Daybreak and are officially homeless! It was so hard to sell that house that I envisioned our family growing up in! Plans change and how quickly it can happen. So not far off the year mark I signed over my dream home that I never planned to leave! It was amazing for as long as it lasted and for now I am grateful that we are able to move forward relatively quickly.

As far as the home search here not much is happening here. I have fallen in love with a few homes quickly then sustained intense sticker shock when reminded of the price! I have emotionally moved into homes then moved right back out when the bank didn't want to negotiate as much as we had hoped they would. Needless to say it has been an emotional roller coaster ride of a home search with ups and downs and hopes and heartbreaks. It is hard to choose and area for your family to live when you know little about the area. It's not as clear cut as Utah where you have specific areas to avoid... West side vs. east side or Kearns vs. Daybreak. I guess at this point it doesn't matter where we live, it's more about staying tight as a family and watching out for each other. So we are down to 4 houses and in some way, shape, or form we have to settle with each whether the house is killer inside but the yard is the size of a popsicle stick or the house is less than ideal but it has amazing outdoor space. I have yet to have the clouds in the sky part and a pillar of light come down and have that "Ah Ha Moment!" So for now we will continue to live out of a 53' semi trailer parked in back of Colin's office. We have joked... as inappropriately as it might be... that we are officially trailer trash and soon my butt will be as double wide as the trailer I call my house! Good times!

Chloe has adapted well to her new school and I can't believe summer is just around the corner for her. She only has 4 days of school left then I will be fully responsible for entertaining her ALL day long! Considering that she asks me EVERY night what we are going to be doing the next day I should get on top of making some plans to keep this girl busy! Since we have been here she has had her 6th birthday that we celebrated at Chuck E Cheese... which I couldn't have been more thrilled about... paying exorbitant amounts of money to eat pizza that tastes similar to cardboard and be exposed to the cesspool of living viruses currently thriving on every surface of the arcade games that take ridiculous sums of money to operate while spitting out only a few (I mean like 2) tickets at a time! I might as well save my money and my immune system the hassle and go to the local dollar store to by that stupid stuffed animal that ends up costing you $20 plus dollars at freakin' Chuck E Cheese because it is readily available for you around the corner at the Dollar Tree for... a whole DOLLAR! Needless to say... It wasn't about me and my anal retentive, obsessive compulsive issues, it was about Chloe and her 6th birthday and going to the only place on earth "were a kid can be a kid"! We had a BLAST and no one came down with the swine flu so we escaped the Chuck E Cheese relatively unscathed... except for my bank account. Chloe has blossomed into such a fun little person! She is beginning to read story books and continues to surprise me on a daily basis about how much she is learning and growing up! I can't believe I am a mom of a soon to be first grader!

Kate is my little hellion trooper... She is growing faster than I can keep up and she is an absolute riot to watch her as she discovers and conquers the world. She is constantly challenging me with her two year old attitude... but what can I say I love the kid! Her vocabulary is coming along quite well. We have finally moved past the only three words I thought she knew: show, diet-coke, and no! I think we can attribute her vocabulary to being forced to express herself to any one of the seven people living with her because not all can interpret the two year old talk. It also helps that we have conquered the binky and finally got rid of that stupid green thing! She was getting more and more attached on a daily basis. So one morning that I had amazing energy and a wild hair I cut up all of her binkies right in front of her! I cut off the nipple and gave it right back to her... she put it on her finger... the only logical way to hold a binky... and as her finger poked through the end of the nipple she put it in her mouth, sucked, took it out of her mouth, examined the bink... then threw it at me and yelled, "Mama, broken!" and proceeded to check each bink which she kept a constant stash of three and threw each one of them at me yelling, "BROKEN!" I know that I deserve the meanest mom in the world award for that one but, I am hoping someday when she doesn't have buck teeth she will thank me for not allowing her to take her binky to kindergarten with her and be incessantly ridiculed by classmates. No worries I made a $20 deposit in the therapy jar for that one. Other than that Kate is doing well and she keeps me constant company at home and gets into any trouble she can find or any prescription bottle she can find... (no worries, we called poison control and they said she would live... Thanks Mimi) She has thankfully moved on from being obsessed with her winter coat to her swimsuit... No joke she calls it her fwimming fute, and will not go anywhere without it on. It doesn't matter if we can't find hers (wink, wink) either... she is completely content to wear her sister's as well and it is only about 4 sizes too big! I force her to put clothes on over the top to go out in public. The hilarious thing is the only way I can get her to take it off is to get it wet!?! Yep you heard me right, she doesn't like her swimming suits wet... when you wear them you wear them to stay dry! Funny kid! I guess I should chalk it up as a success because at least I don't look like a lunatic mother with a kid who is wearing a fur lined coat in the summer because it's hotter here than normal and I am sure at some point she would pass out due to heat exhaustion or dehydration because she is sweating like crazy... or "wet sweat" as Chloe calls it. Gotta love them kids!

Colin is as busy as ever! The focus has finally moved from introductions and traveling around to all the new area resorts to staying local and getting the shop put together. He has finally hired a few people for some extra hands to help and that seems to be taking a load off. They have recently received 60 pallets of parts that he is responsible to get organized and inventory and ready at a moments notice if a snowcat were to need a part. He seems to still be enjoying it although in my opinion the "shiny" has worn off a little and it is beginning to be a job now. Although he enjoys being his own boss there is a heavy burden that comes along with the responsibility of others and a multimillion dollar budget. We are both looking forward to moving into a house closer to the shop because the 45 minute commute each way is just no fun... although I can think of a simple solution to a commute that he would be satisfied with... it only requires a large sum of money, two wheels, 600 cc of power between his legs and thankfully a helmet because it's the LAW here! I'm sure if he commuted that way I wouldn't hear so much about it :)

I am hanging in as well. Everyday is getting a little better along with a little medication to make my life easier... unfortunately it is not the little green leafy type that you can smoke (because it is readily available and abundant here) but it works to help me face the day and smooth out the bumpy road ahead. Frankly I can't believe that I am admitting it but I am... I can't believe how much I feel better when I get out of the house. I have come to find a new passion for the road but unlike Colin's enjoyment, I am the motor. Cycling has brought me an out and some sanity a break from the monotony. I bought a trailer for me to pull behind the bike so Kate is my co-pilot and gets dragged on a daily ride, but actually she seems to enjoy it quite a bit. I am riding about 60-70 miles a week... I would ride farther if it didn't feel like I was dragging a parachute behind me, but I chalk it up as some resistance training and look forward to the day that I can get a "real" road bike and bust out a long 20 mile ride in one day and it is just me and the road (and my ipod for the inspiriting tunes)... As for now I will take what I can get and be grateful that the repercussions for riding my bike means I won't have a double wide butt to go with my double wide trailer.

As for now my rant must come to an end... It's time to pick Chloe up from school. More to come later! Thanks for letting me check in... if you stuck with it long enough to get to the end! Ciao for now!

Hey Girls! I Miss You All!

Hey ladies... 

I have to say thanks for that one last girls night out!  It was a total surprise and it was so nice to spend a few last hours with you girls.   I have to say it made it hard to leave but at least when I left I had one last happy memory to take with me!  Love you all!

We are here... in Oregon!

Again I have been a total slacker lately with the posting and the keeping in touch with the blogging world, so I'll apologize in advance for the upcoming post that will try to jam all the information into one post.  

We left Utah on February 5th... I think?  Anyway, a Wednesday morning and made the 12 hour 836 mile journey to Forest Grove Oregon.  We got here safely with little adventure on the way, and unloaded the U-haul that we towed behind bringing up what necessary items we couldn't leave behind.  The first day after arrival Chloe got to visit her school and was thrilled to learn that she gets to ride the bus to get there.  We got to meet with her new teacher named Mrs. Wolfington, she was a little tentative to go to a new school and meet new friends but after 2 weeks she seems to be settling in and doing just fine.  She doesn't have many friends to play with after school so she gets bored a lot here at home but otherwise there are no complaints... She considers herself one lucky girl to be able to live with her Mimi and Papa!  

Colin has been insanely busy with opening this new office and getting things set up.  It has been his responsibility to furnish, decorate and stock the office with all of the necessary office things.  He has also had to meet with tech people to get phone/internet/data lines in place.  It has been a very very long list of to-do's but he has done well considering he has no helping hands on a daily basis.  I have tried to do what I can on the weekends but the girls can only handle so much shopping and camping out at the office!  Colin is excited for this new opportunity and is meeting with the new clients and is looking forward to getting the office to be a little more self sufficient so that he doesn't have to work 12 hours a day like he has been.  He spent one week back in NY meeting with the engineers from Germany and it seems Colin is going to be a valuable asset to his new company.  I will post pictures of the office at some point but I don't have any right now... Sorry!

So I have been busy with integrating back into the Hansen family culture.  I sincerely appreciate my family making room for us during this transitional phase... I never thought I would have to move back in with my parents!  It is definitely a different experience living with parents and siblings again with a family of your own.  More playmates for the kids though! 

In reflection of the last couple weeks I have definitely not been the most optimistic person about this move.  It has been tougher than I ever imagined and I have been missing Utah more than ever.  Considering what I know now, I can't say that I wouldn't be thrilled to change my mind about this job opportunity if it meant I could and pack my stuff and be back in Utah by tomorrow.  With that being said, I am working on adjusting my attitude.  This is tough and with Colin working as many hours as he has been I have been missing my friends who were my sanity when Colin travelled or worked late before.  This too shall pass and hopefully sooner than later we will sell our house in Utah and be able to purchase a new home here somewhere closer into town and to Colin's workplace.   Then I will be able to really integrate into a new neighborhood and see what friends I can make... I just need to find the emotional energy somehow somewhere to do that.  

Through all of this adventure and change and adjustment and transition, I hope that we come out of this chaos a happier, stronger, and closer family.  Now I just pray for the patience to see it through!  

We miss our friends and family back in Utah and hope that all is well for all of you!  I will try to be better about posting more frequently.... but for now this is where we are and what is going on!  Loves to all!

What a difference a month can make!

So it has been way too long since my last post... but really I am just trying to get my head around the events that have taken place since the first of December. In a nutshell we are moving to Portland... For the more detailed version... Here we go!

Colin has been working in the ski industry for over 10 years now and currently works for Prinoth. He was recently approached by the "competiton" Pisten Bully. Mind you, there are only 2 snowcat manufacturing companies globally. Anyway, just before Thanksgiving we received a phone call asking if Colin would even entertain the idea of accepting a job with Pisten Bully... he thought, "What the hell, what can it hurt right? Let's just see what they have to offer!" So within a couple weeks of the phone call he flew out to Reno for the official interview, and of course, he nailed it. Game on now... they want him. They offered him the positional of Operations Manager of the Pacific Northwest territory. So PB was trying to figure out where the location of the office would be and they told him somewhere in the Pacific Northwest. As far as we were concerned it could have been located in Seattle, Tacoma, Portland or anywhere else in that general vicinity. A few weeks later PB came back and told us that they had leased an office in the Portland Metro area, Tualatin, about 20 minutes southwest of Portland.

Are you kidding me??? That is within a 45 minute drive to my parents!

So the offer was ours for the taking and the ball was in our court. So we asked them to send us to the Portland area so that we could look at the housing market and the different areas located around the shop to see if it would be a fit for our family. After much heart ache and stress and prayer, Colin decided that this was going to be the right career move for him and for our family. So here we are in the end of January packin' up and heading out. It is a very bittersweet situation for me. I can't wait to live close to my family but it is going to be so so so hard to leave the family I have created for myself here. So to sum it all up... I can't believe it, my head is still spinning, and within a month I will be a resident of the state of Oregon. I never thought... ever... that I would be saying just that.